change

i think i love change...i think i could move anywhere and get by...i think i could start something i feel is important and finish it because change is good and moving and finishing things those are change to me....change of pace, change of style, change of motives, change of life.

yet the normally things, i fell should never move. or i guess a better way of saying that is the Dallas things should never move. I come home and my house is different, my mom is different, my sister is different. I don't get it. I don't get the change. Dallas is suppose to stay untouched, unaltered by time.

I can change, i can grow, i can move...but Dallas is not suppose to be different. It is suppose to be how i left it. A TV in my room, a empty spot for my car, a bed that is unslept in because i am gone. and instead i fine, an empty space in my room where movies where once watched, i fine a car filling the third spot in our garage, I find my room taken over my a girl in high school.

It is not that i am not OK with these changes, it is that in my world these changes did not occur, these new things where not there, in my world, Dallas is unchanged by time. Dallas is home and home is not suppose to be altered by the fact that i left it a year and half a ago.

i thought i loved change but here i am unable to see the light in all this change.
home is not the same, but neither and I

i guess there is some hope in that somewhere.