Drama, Drama,Drama

There are days where love is in the air, where faith stands firm and life is easy to be lived.

There are days where hope seems endless, age seems not to matter, and joy is peace dancing.

Then there are days where drama conquers, where over reacting is a style, and where life becomes hard.

I live in all of these moments.

I was reminded this morning that a quite life is one where you win the respect of the people near you. (1 thess 4)

Quite is a goal, quite is a way of life I do not understand all time.

Quite is a new path, one I shall try to walk more regularly.

forgiving in world where forgiveness is a lost art

Last night I sat in church and heard a sermon on forgiveness.

Nothing new, Nothing old, pure truth.

As a kid I was taught to say sorry not when I thought I was wrong but when what I did hurt others. So at times I was saying sorry but understanding the what that was behind the words I spoke.

As a youth I sat and listened to girls hurt each other with their words and actions and it never even cross their mind that they could be hurting those near them.

As a college student I lived in a world where hurt was a definition of life for a while. Where forgiveness was not a word i spoke or heard but excuses where all around.

Since then I have walk a path where forgiving allows me to see that life is easier when you forgive and move on. Life works better, freedom is found and hope for a better life is closer then one might think.

Forgiveness is seeing what has happened, naming it and letting it go. A choice is made.

Last night i heard the words "you have to know what you are forgiving them for."

This changed my outlook last night. Putting a face to the thing or person you are forgiving allows for the forgiveness to actually happen.

Sometimes i get it, sometimes people are up front, and they are honest with how i hurt then and then sorry and forgive me actually mean what they are suppose to.

Sometimes i miss it and people hurt me and i act like i am tough enough to make it through the night, through the week without help and with out them saying that they are sorry.

Then time passes and i go on in life, i act whole and healed and I act like my life is all together.

Then I hear those words, "you have to know what you are forgiving them of"

I forgave the person, I think we could be friends again, I think we could talk and hang out.

I forgave the person but not the act.

I live a life of guardedness, not because i did not forgive the person, but because i did not forgive the act.

I live a life arms length apart. I live a life of don't hurt me and I won't hurt you. I live a life of get this close but not that close. I live a life of we can be friends but not.

The act needs to be forgiven.

So last night, I forgave the act. I forgave the what. I took note of what had happened and I forgave.